Billy Gilman: Heart Songs

by Marti Attoun

When a young poet and a young country singer met, a one-of-a-kind friendship was born and a musical journey began. Mattie Stepanek, 13, had the words. Billy Gilman, 15, had the voice. And both had the courage to ask the world to try harder at peace and kindness.

The result is Music Through Heartsongs, an album based on the poems Matthew “Mattie” Stepanek has been writing since age 3 to express his feelings about his life-threatening illness. The rare form of muscular dystrophy took the lives of his three siblings. His mother, Jeni Stepanek, has a milder version.

“I choose to live with hope,” says Stepanek, who requires a ventilator and wheelchair. “When I was born, the doctors didn’t think I’d live one day, but I did. Then they thought I wouldn’t live one year, but I did … I think I’m here for a reason.”

Stepanek’s poems, wrapped in the warmth of Gilman’s voice, remind the world to “celebrate life, every day, in some way.” And he’s worked out a three-part plan for peace: Make peace an attitude—want it; Make peace a habit—live it; and Make peace a reality—share it.

“Whether you’re 8 or 80, I think you can learn a lesson from Mattie,” Gilman says. “To play after every storm is Mattie’s motto. Appreciate the simple things in life.”

The boys met when CNN talk show host Larry King, who saw parallels in their messages and early successes, booked them on the show the same night. Both boys had achieved national fame by age 11. Gilman debuted with One Voice and became the top-selling country debut artist in 2000. Since then, he’s sold more than 3 million albums. Stepanek’s first book of poetry, Heartsongs, was published in 2001 and his next, Journey Through Heartsongs, hit the New York Times bestseller list. He’s published three more.

On Larry King Live, Gilman was in the New York studio and Stepanek in Washington, D.C.

“After the show, I looked over and saw my mother and father crying,” Gilman says. “They were so inspired and so touched by this kid who has such an amazing outlook, yet never knows when he’s going to die.”

Before long, Gilman and Stepanek were chatting by phone and e-mail weekly. Gilman’s manager, Angela Bacari, first suggested the possibility of setting Stepanek’s poems to music, and producer and songwriter David Malloy made it happen. Stepanek couldn’t attend the recording sessions, “but he was on the speaker phone 24/7,” Gilman says.

“I’m absolutely thrilled with the CD. It’s beautiful,” says Stepanek, who has been hospitalized since January. “And Billy’s such a nice person.”

He describes the album as “something for everyone—a little spiritual, a little jazz, some soft rock, and even some Caribbean music.”

But mainly, Heartsongs, released last April, is a whole lot of heartfelt message, a message both boys present as representatives for the Muscular Dystrophy Assocation (MDA). Gilman is National Youth Chairman and Stepanek is in his second year as MDA’s National Goodwill Ambassador.

“A heartsong,” Stepanek says, “is your inner beauty. It’s the song in your heart that wants you to help make yourself a better person.”

Start of the heart

Both boys’ talents came to light as toddlers. Fran Gilman, 45, remembers a star-struck moment when Billy was just 2 or 3. The family lives in Hope Valley, R.I., (pop. 1,649) and didn’t have cable television. A family member taped a SeaWorld special so Billy could enjoy the dolphins and whales.

“Unbeknownst to me, Pam Tillis was the guest star. Billy couldn’t have cared less about the dolphins,” Mrs. Gilman says. “After playing it twice, he knew word for word the songs she sang. And his stage presence, even as a toddler, was just overwhelming. It’s a gift.”

From kindergarten on, Gilman told his teachers and friends he planned to be a singer. For show-and-tell, he brought tapes and sang to the class.

“We’d have cookouts and he’d come across the yard with his hand-held karaoke and sing. Basically, he gets through one song and he owns the audience,” says Mrs. Gilman. She and husband, Bill, are also parents of Colin, 11.

Stepanak, who lives with his mother in Rockville, Md., (pop. 47,388) started dictating poems at age 3 after the death of his brother, Jamie, 4. Complications from mitochondrial myopathy, a rare neuromuscular disease, had already taken the lives of Katie, 2, and Stevie, 6 months. The condition is so rare that the children were misdiagnosed for some time, Ms. Stepanek, 43, says.

“I grieved, obviously, but here was this preschooler, so very intelligent, and facing the loss of his best friend and brother. They had shared the same monitors and life support,” she says. “Mattie had to be taught to express his grief. He had to learn that it was okay to cry and to stomp your foot. It was okay to laugh and play even after his brother died.”

Stepanek wrote his way with unabashed honesty through the darkness, sometimes dictating a dozen poems a day. By 7, he could type his own. He’s written thousands of philosophical, upbeat, and insightful poems.

Both boys and men

Stepanek sees his mission as a peacemaker, and is writing a book of essays about peacemakers with encouragement from former President Jimmy Carter, who has promised to put him in touch with Nelson Mandela, Desmond Tutu, and other great peacemakers.

When Stepanek and Gilman get together, though, they act and talk more like . . . well, regular kids.

“Billy and I just talk about things, like our views of the world, and we play practical jokes,” Stepanek says. Together, they’ve conned more than one visitor into reaching into a box with a plastic rat lurking inside.

Says Gilman, “I get to see both sides of Mattie. When he’s in front of the camera you see this humble peacemaker, a 13-year-old who acts like he’s 50. It’s like you’re listening to his idol, Jimmy Carter. Yet after the cameras are turned off, he’s talking about Harry Potter and playing tricks on everyone. If you’re around us, you’ll get pranked.

“And you can either hear it or see it, Mattie always has a smile on his face,” adds Gilman.

Morning Gift

Don’t you love the mornings
When you go outside,\
And there on the ground
Is a fresh, perfect, green leaf?
A leaf, floated from the
Quiet summer trees,
Just resting on the grass, and
Waiting to be discovered.
Touch the treasure, and
Pick it up gently, then
Feel all the excitement of
A new leaf, with no tears,
No marks, no holes.
It is a sign of healing and future,
Don’t you just love the mornings
When you are reminded of
The special gifts of life?
(June 1999)